woke up feeling damn bloody miserable. thought i was going to die. heh. throat was totally sore and my voice was kinda raspy. it did get better as the day wore on but my throat itched constantly. was looking forward to resting in the morning before having to get my butt down to Forum to meet up with Joanne Ang.
then just a little after 8.45am, Jean called to tell me that my coaching session with boss is still on. was contemplating whether or not to get an MC but decided to head down to the office anyway. took a panadol to help preempt any headache and then cabbed down. damage done by cab? $15.
after the coaching, went straight home to take more medicine before cabbing down to Forum. heh. this is where things got interesting. i was kind of wondering why Joanne would be asking me if i’m free. usually, people wouldn’t be calling a financial consultant out unless they are already the client of the consultant. silly me. i didn’t realised she had an agenda. turns out, Joanne was from Amway.
she and her upline did the whole presentation. i have to admit the presentation was well done. i probably could use something similar to present to my prospects. very needs based. concept was well thought of. however, i wasn’t interested. for one thing, i used to be a member of Amway. i never did subscribe into the whole MLM thing though. the only reason why i signed up for Amway in 2003 was because i like the products. i signed up only to get the member’s discount.
anyway, it was a wasted day and the total damage done by cab today was about $30. not only was i not able to do a presentation, i was the one at the receiving end of one.
oh. and it gets better. i just received a call from Jean. guess what? heh. seems that i may not be able to collect this month’s EP after all. no more basic pay of $2000. well. i guess that’s that. in a way, it’s both good and bad. good in that there’s no longer a crutch i can count on. i will now sink or swim.
it’s do or die. i told myself i will not leave this industry. so now… it seems i have to walk the walk instead of just talking. i have always been running away from things. now’s the time to just fucking stay and fight. i shall take it one step further. i shall do. or die trying. either way, it’s time to get my head out of the sand.
although to be honest, i’m actually afraid. seriously, when Jean broke the news to me, i was speechless. you know how sometimes, you’d just want to laugh hysterically at things when you receive a news you can’t take? well… that was what happened. she said “have a good night’s rest yah?” and my response?
“haha. urm. a good night’s rest? after that news? haha! okay.”
haha. yes. haha. a good night’s rest huh? i don’t know how i am going to have a good night’s rest. even now, i’m sort of just typing randomly. rambling on and on. i want to stop typing but if i were to stop typing, i wouldn’t know what to do with myself.
i shall go play the guitar. i wish i have a drum set.
when you have reached rock bottom, there is no way to go but up. i wish i have hit the bottom already. my only fear is that i have a ways more to drop.